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A klutz’s guide to being klutzy!!!

Published January 23, 2012 by klutzy279

As I’ve mentioned I am very talented at falling over and being klutzy in general.  Bella Swan has nothing on me!!!!! Some of my greatest achievements are among the following,  drumroll please……..

Age 2 1/2  managing to fall off a stool and put all my front teeth up in my gum (see I started young!)

Getting hit by a car and breaking a leg

Falling down the same set of stairs twice in one day

Slipping at work while making a sandwich, and managing to slide out the gap in the counter to where the customer was waiting for said sandwich

Falling down the stairs at about 7.30 am while leaving to go to an exam with my coat and backpack on, and having my cranky neighbour come over and threaten to call the guards because of the noise I made.

Falling off a step ladder and managing to get both feet caught in it while doing so.

Tripping at school and launching myself over at least five school bags , Evel Knievel eat your heart out!!!!

Anyways I feel I have acquired enough experience to allow me top give advice to my fellow klutzs. Here are some top tips

Non slip shoes are a must! but not too non slip, you can trip just as easily when your feet grip too well!

Always watch out for leads from computers, hoovers etc

Wet floors are a no no!

Never consider working as a waitress!

Be wary of hot beverages and soup (see above advice)

Be wary of automatic doors!

Superglue is a must …..nuff said!

Protect your face as much as possible, I have walked into doors on several occasions, people don’t buy it……

Above all be zen when falling over is inevitable, a sore ass is better then a broken arm from trying to stop yourself

 

My fellow klutzs go forth and fall over and break things in peace!!!

X

 

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